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Still having Hot Flashes…

This week has been filled with highs and lows. Needless to say I’m ready to relax tomorrow and forget the world exists. July 25 I went into the fertility doctor’s office and they gave me the shot. They said once week 12 hits I shouldn’t have hot flashes, insomnia, etc. I’m having the hot flashes and even worse the ever before. My ears turn bright red,  my nose turns red and my entire body from top to bottom sweats so much you’d think I Just ran a marathon.

It’s been a long week because there has been a lot to do. I had to schedule our second opinion. We’ve decided it’s best to go to Cincinnati. I already see a Nuerologist at UC Health. Dr. Vij. He’s amazing and the reason I keep going back to get my botox! I’m getting my last botox treatment until after we give birth. In order to get botox I have to count four months out on the calendar and know when we’re in the safe zone to conceive.  But I am excited to meet this new guy and see what he has to say. Everyone is going to be different but I hope he will hear me when I speak to him. We have a lot more reasons for choosing UC Health but getting the best care is what is most important to us, especially if I have to pay for everything then I’ll make sure  we are seeing the person we want to see. Not to mention our current doctor can’t see us until we are ready to begin IVF treatment. We feel this is the perfect time to get a second opinion. I realize all the costs that are associated with infertility but I am signing up to get pregnant.

But I’ve had such a down week. It all began at the beginning of the week because I was feeling awful. I had to cancel a few appointments I had with friends and with my doctors simply because I couldn’t get out of bed. I cried a lot and  said to the universe ” why is this happening to us? I’ve been a little unstable emotionally this week. Every little thing stressing me out. I’m noticing negative thoughts are entering my space. Thoughts talking about me as a mother, how do I deserve a child over someone else, am I ready, etc. All these questions are consuming me and for a split second earlier this week I thought maybe I’m being punished for something I did in a past life. But I’m coming around now.

Some days are better than others and I’m still learning how to deal with emotions that infertility brings.  As also, please hug a friend extra tight and let them know you’re there. Even if it’s just to text about their day. I have a very small circle of girlfriends and one of them has been so understanding of why I can’t do things when I did say I could do. She understands how much this takes out of me. I’m not ignoring anyone if they are trying to hang out!

Until Next Time

xoxo

 

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Dayton, fashionista, fitness, life, Mary Kay Cosmetics, modeling, Ohio, pageant girl, photography, shoe addict, women

Official shoot as Miss Miami Valley Captivating

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Have you ever had that feeling that you are so lucky to have met someone? Well that has happened to me. Before pageants I had only known one photographer and while his work is amazing he lives an hour and half away from me which isn’t always easy, especially when he has other things he does. So one day I just happened to take the spot of a girl who couldn’t do a Mary Kay vendor event. That is when I me Beth. Oddly, it was like love at first sight, seriously. She is the most bubbly person and she is so just so cute and SO MUCH FUN! I am so thankful for her. Like I’ve said in my previous post Beth is amazing to work with She find these amazing places to shoot and I just always have a blast when I’m with her

The purpose of this shoot was to showcase me , officially, as Miss Miami Valley Captivating! I love every photo. The first photo you will see is my favorite because I was not paying attention. Beth was doing a few practice shots and this one made the cut. To me it is so stunning and elegant, everything a girl wants to feel 🙂 These pictures are so fun and so me and if you have a chance please follow Beth on instagram (@bethphillipsphoto) and see her work for yourselves!! Check out the link below to see my fabulous pictures!!

http://bethphillips.zenfolio.com/p259510470

Until next time!

xoxo

boudoir, Dayton, Mary Kay Cosmetics, modeling, Ohio, photography

Photography

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If you haven’t heard of Beth Phillips Blair, you are missing out on getting the best pictures you’ve ever seen taken. She is incredibly talented and I am beyond blessed to know her and call her my friend.

I met Beth a few years ago at a vendor event. I was filling in for a girl who couldn’t go. Beth approached me and handed me a Stella and Dot look book. (Everything is super cute) We stayed in touch through social media and when it came time to compete in my pageant last year I borrowed a few items from her. This year she decided she wanted to expand her portfolio and asked if I would be her model. Of course I said yes! Beth also did my official photos for Miss Ohio US International. We were outside in the cold, while it was raining, taking these photos and they turned out beautifully.

We went to studio one in Dayton. I had never heard of studio one but when I got there I knew it was the perfect space. We went with two outfits and did a mini boudoir session. I have always loved being in front of a camera and knew this opportunity would be fantastic. The session was super quick and so much fun! I was laughing and comfortable. Those are two things that are very important to me when I am modeling for someone. I want to be able to have a good time but most importantly I want to feel comfortable. I have always been a little shy and insecure but with Beth there is no second guessing. There is no thinking if I am standing at the right angle or look good in the lighting. Shooting with Beth was a dream come true. Her work is perfection and she takes it very seriously. There aren’t enough wonderful things I can say about Beth.

I hope you all enjoy the photos as much as I do because I never felt more amazing! For more information about Beth check out her website! http://bethphillips.zenfolio.com/

Until next time!

xoxo