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Still having Hot Flashes…

This week has been filled with highs and lows. Needless to say I’m ready to relax tomorrow and forget the world exists. July 25 I went into the fertility doctor’s office and they gave me the shot. They said once week 12 hits I shouldn’t have hot flashes, insomnia, etc. I’m having the hot flashes and even worse the ever before. My ears turn bright red,  my nose turns red and my entire body from top to bottom sweats so much you’d think I Just ran a marathon.

It’s been a long week because there has been a lot to do. I had to schedule our second opinion. We’ve decided it’s best to go to Cincinnati. I already see a Nuerologist at UC Health. Dr. Vij. He’s amazing and the reason I keep going back to get my botox! I’m getting my last botox treatment until after we give birth. In order to get botox I have to count four months out on the calendar and know when we’re in the safe zone to conceive.  But I am excited to meet this new guy and see what he has to say. Everyone is going to be different but I hope he will hear me when I speak to him. We have a lot more reasons for choosing UC Health but getting the best care is what is most important to us, especially if I have to pay for everything then I’ll make sure  we are seeing the person we want to see. Not to mention our current doctor can’t see us until we are ready to begin IVF treatment. We feel this is the perfect time to get a second opinion. I realize all the costs that are associated with infertility but I am signing up to get pregnant.

But I’ve had such a down week. It all began at the beginning of the week because I was feeling awful. I had to cancel a few appointments I had with friends and with my doctors simply because I couldn’t get out of bed. I cried a lot and  said to the universe ” why is this happening to us? I’ve been a little unstable emotionally this week. Every little thing stressing me out. I’m noticing negative thoughts are entering my space. Thoughts talking about me as a mother, how do I deserve a child over someone else, am I ready, etc. All these questions are consuming me and for a split second earlier this week I thought maybe I’m being punished for something I did in a past life. But I’m coming around now.

Some days are better than others and I’m still learning how to deal with emotions that infertility brings.  As also, please hug a friend extra tight and let them know you’re there. Even if it’s just to text about their day. I have a very small circle of girlfriends and one of them has been so understanding of why I can’t do things when I did say I could do. She understands how much this takes out of me. I’m not ignoring anyone if they are trying to hang out!

Until Next Time

xoxo

 

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black, blogger, body shaming, breaking news, Dayton, fashionista, growing, I Am That Girl, learning, Making a difference, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Ohio, pageant girl, race, racial issues, thoughts, transparency, truth, Uncategorized, Volunteer

I Am That Girl

As many of you know, I am now the new Dayton Chapter Leader for the AUH-MAZING non-profit organization called I Am That Girl. For those that don’t know this non-profit is a fairly new organization. I am beyond grateful to be the leader for the city of Dayton. So here is some information so you can get to know a little bit more about what I will be doing and trying to accomplish.

I AM That Girl (IATG) was founded in 2008 by Alexis Jones and Emily Greener. Their mission is to empower young women through having honest and open conversations in a safe environment. Thank goodness for women like them starting their own non-profit to bring women up, not tear them down.

I decided to get involved because all too often we see how awful people can be towards one another. I have seen first hand the way young women are spoken to and I want to change that. I want to change so many things about our society (but that’s another post for a different day). I want to change how women view themselves. How many times do we say “I’m fat” “I’m ugly” “I’m not wearing a cute outfit”…the list goes on. I want to change that. I want girls to say I’m pretty without having to wear a lot of makeup. I don’t need to be a certain size for me to think I’m pretty. I want women to say my body is the way that is it and I’m so thankful for the way I was made because that’s what makes me unique. We all can’t be the same. We all can’t look the same. BUT we all can defy the Hollywood stereotype of what makes a woman beautiful. I’m telling you what ladies, ALL of you reading this is beautiful. You are all unique and that makes you special. You don’t have to be a model to be pretty. You don’t have to have a lot of money to be pretty. What makes a person pretty is what is in their soul. Are you the kind of person that wants to see others succeed? I hope so.

I personally believe your vibe attracts your tribe. If you are negative you are going to get negative friends. If you are positive you are going to get positive friends. You can’t lead a negative life and expect to get positive results. What you put out into the universe is what you will receive. So surround yourself with like minded women who want to change the word. Because I tell you what, it only takes one woman’s fierce determination to change one thing. It’s better to change one thing about the world and leave it a little better than you came into, than to not try at all.

Until next time!

xoxo

best friend, black, Dayton, fashionista, fitness, life, make up lover, Making a difference, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Ohio, pageant girl, Pageants, Shoes

An open letter to my best friend

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Caitlyn

To say I’m proud of you would be an understatement. Your hard work, persistence, and never give up attitude landed you in the Top 15 of Miss Ohio USA. Watching you last night on stage was one of the highlights of my year. This journey hasn’t been easy for you ( but how boring would it have been if it was?!) but you pushed hard, made sacrifices, and knew that with God on your side you could do anything you set your mind to. Preparing for a pageant is more difficult than anyone can imagine. You worked harder than ever; working out, practicing, and even watching what you eat (btw I hope your enjoying a donut as you read this!) to make sure your body was in top shape, and you looked amazing!

Caitlyn, you are one of the kindest, sweetest souls I have ever met. You show me day in and day out what it means to let God show your way. Throughout this entire process you have known all along that God has a bigger plan for you than you can imagine. I can’t even begin to tell you how amazing that is. Watching you grow and become more confident in yourself has been such a joy.

I am so grateful to have you in my life. Thankful for all of our conversations. Thankful to have a pageant sister like you that goes to the end of the earth for her bestie, even if we do live 3.5 hours away from each other. I am in awe of your grace and how much your give of yourself. I am so thankful for the friendship we share and can’t wait to see where your path will lead you.  Thank you for being the role model, an inspiration, and more importantly for being a strong woman of God.

With love

Dayton, fashionista, fitness, life, Mary Kay Cosmetics, modeling, Ohio, pageant girl, photography, shoe addict, women

Official shoot as Miss Miami Valley Captivating

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Have you ever had that feeling that you are so lucky to have met someone? Well that has happened to me. Before pageants I had only known one photographer and while his work is amazing he lives an hour and half away from me which isn’t always easy, especially when he has other things he does. So one day I just happened to take the spot of a girl who couldn’t do a Mary Kay vendor event. That is when I me Beth. Oddly, it was like love at first sight, seriously. She is the most bubbly person and she is so just so cute and SO MUCH FUN! I am so thankful for her. Like I’ve said in my previous post Beth is amazing to work with She find these amazing places to shoot and I just always have a blast when I’m with her

The purpose of this shoot was to showcase me , officially, as Miss Miami Valley Captivating! I love every photo. The first photo you will see is my favorite because I was not paying attention. Beth was doing a few practice shots and this one made the cut. To me it is so stunning and elegant, everything a girl wants to feel 🙂 These pictures are so fun and so me and if you have a chance please follow Beth on instagram (@bethphillipsphoto) and see her work for yourselves!! Check out the link below to see my fabulous pictures!!

http://bethphillips.zenfolio.com/p259510470

Until next time!

xoxo

boudoir, Dayton, Mary Kay Cosmetics, modeling, Ohio, photography

Photography

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If you haven’t heard of Beth Phillips Blair, you are missing out on getting the best pictures you’ve ever seen taken. She is incredibly talented and I am beyond blessed to know her and call her my friend.

I met Beth a few years ago at a vendor event. I was filling in for a girl who couldn’t go. Beth approached me and handed me a Stella and Dot look book. (Everything is super cute) We stayed in touch through social media and when it came time to compete in my pageant last year I borrowed a few items from her. This year she decided she wanted to expand her portfolio and asked if I would be her model. Of course I said yes! Beth also did my official photos for Miss Ohio US International. We were outside in the cold, while it was raining, taking these photos and they turned out beautifully.

We went to studio one in Dayton. I had never heard of studio one but when I got there I knew it was the perfect space. We went with two outfits and did a mini boudoir session. I have always loved being in front of a camera and knew this opportunity would be fantastic. The session was super quick and so much fun! I was laughing and comfortable. Those are two things that are very important to me when I am modeling for someone. I want to be able to have a good time but most importantly I want to feel comfortable. I have always been a little shy and insecure but with Beth there is no second guessing. There is no thinking if I am standing at the right angle or look good in the lighting. Shooting with Beth was a dream come true. Her work is perfection and she takes it very seriously. There aren’t enough wonderful things I can say about Beth.

I hope you all enjoy the photos as much as I do because I never felt more amazing! For more information about Beth check out her website! http://bethphillips.zenfolio.com/

Until next time!

xoxo

animal lover, fashionista, foodie, make up lover, Mary Kay Cosmetics, pageant girl, shoe addict

Hello world!

Welcome to my first blog! I want to take this time to introduce myself to the blogging world!

My name is Angelica and I am a 25 year old trying to make a name for myself in this crazy world. I have three dogs that I will talk about a lot and who are more to me than just dogs, they are my crazy fur children. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend, Russell, for almost seven years now.I love my Mary Kay and have been a consultant for over 4 years!  My best friends mean the world to me and they are my confidants, I would be lost without them. I currently compete in the amazing pageant world.  (More on that later) I love food, so don’t be surprised when I blog about my latest adventures to local food trucks and farmers markets. I love fashion, my family, shoes, and animals. With each passing blog youll get to know more about me! Until next time when you get to find out why I decided to name my blog brown biscuit adventures!

xoxo